If you’re generally an organized person who keeps everything in its place and functions day to day in a relatively clean and orderly manner, you’re more likely to get along in close quarters with someone who’s similar in style. Someone who is not organized will likely wig you out.

If you’re not organized and orderly in how you think, how you function, how you manage your life, even where you put things, you may be fine with someone who’s organized or not organized; it might just not matter that much to you.

As with all of the 21 traits, it’s not about judgment; it’s about compatibility. Whatever being organized means to you and to what extent it’s important, it makes a difference when it comes to love in the long term.

The bigger point is to consider these things so you’re aware of your needs before you even start dating someone: Are you yourself organized? Do you need to be with someone who is? To what degree is being orderly and organized? Are there things that will set you off in this area or is it just not that big of a deal?

Maybe being with someone who’s organized is a priority for you, maybe it’s not. Either way, you need to know in advance if this is a trait, and ultimately a behavior, that will impact your relationship. Consider where you need your partner to be on the scale below.

So many little things–that aren’t really so little–need to line up for long term relationship success. Organization is just one of them. Ignore it at your own peril.

To identify your Critical Compatibilities and instantly start finding better matches now click here  to take the free 90 second quiz.

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Depending on your personality and needs, it’s best for you to possess the same degree of certain qualities as your partner; respect is an example. Sometimes you’re better off as opposites. For the secure person, it can work either way.

Most of the time, people don’t really consider who they are or what they need. They’re not self-aware. So, they go on and on and on, from relationship to relationship, and never land; they never know what they genuinely offer and absolutely need, what we call, Critical Compatibilities.

Attachment theory, a branch of psychology rooted in childhood bonding, speaks of 4 styles of attaching in relationships: secure, anxious, avoidant, and disorganized. Learning your attachment style, and the kind you pair up with best, is an exercise worth exploring. That’s one context for defining a secure person.

A more common definition is someone who’s considered stable, confident, rational, in control of their emotions. As with most of the 21 traits, you can define yourself and your partner in degrees, toward or away the extreme: You can be very secure, somewhat secure, insecure, very insecure, and so on. And it’s entirely possible for you to prefer and relate better to someone who’s not just like you.

For this trait, consider how secure of a person you are first, then how secure you need your person to be.

To identify your Critical Compatibilities and instantly start finding better matches now click here  to take the free 90 second quiz.

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